🔗 Share this article

“Well, the situation is pretty dire here. The guidance we offer all of our clients to commit their entire holdings into canned food and shotguns.” That bit of wise counsel comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, talking, bespectacled member of the slimy Gremlin horde that infests Manhattan’s super-smart Clamp Tower skyscraper in filmmaker Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Superficially, it’s nothing more than an portfolio pointer from one monster to another. Yet, oddly enough, it’s also remarkably sound life guidance. Honestly, listen to my reasoning.

When situations deteriorate, the biggest mistake you can do is take things too seriously. The Brain Gremlin understands this. Indeed, a large portion of the toothy monsters that occupy Dante’s unrestrained 1990 movie (possibly his finest) possess the same wry, meta funny bone regarding the hazy boundary separating the mundane and absolute bedlam. It’s one element of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that maintains my loyalty – and with the passage of time, it’s the underlying idea that strikes the deepest chord.

A Youthful Fascination

Understandably, my attachment to this movie didn’t start on such an introspective level. Growing up, we only had a few well-worn videocassettes at home. Included within that collection were Gremlins and its second chapter, the latter housed in a thick former-rental sleeve almost certainly acquired from an non-chain rental store and sporting grimacing beasts on its knackered cover. I was right away smitten and these films wasted no time lodging themselves inside my tiny, impressionable mind. From then on, they became an near-everyday part of my early years entertainment regimen.

Dante’s initial installment typically gets all the plaudits, thanks mostly because of its status as a partly frightening holiday classic – and to be fair, I’ve watched Gremlins on countless occasions. However, its successor rarely gets the same level of lofty appreciation, which feels unjust. As a kid, I’d never miss an opportunity to watch Gremlins 2. During sunny school summer breaks, I’d seclude myself indoors and stick it on. When I acquired my personal TV-VHS combo unit, it remained on repeat in my bedroom. Over time, it ingrained itself in my mindset. If my parents detected this preoccupation, they appeared unbothered.

Hidden Delights and Societal Nuggets

As I got older, new understandings enriched frequent screenings, heightening the enjoyment of watching little green monsters joyously wreck a New York high-rise. I learned the forward-thinking development mogul and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was based squarely upon future president Donald Trump, with his ginger staff member Marla (Haviland Morris) referencing his one-time partner Marla Maples. Fortunately, Clamp demonstrates more humanity than his genuine article inspiration.

The “apocalyptic” video Clamp plays during peak-Gremlin chaos? I discovered it was inspired by a genuine “Doomsday” video commissioned by the CNN boss Ted Turner should the world actually met its demise. I noticed how Dante took extra pains to film alternate cuts of a self-aware scene where Gremlins seize control of the exact movie you are viewing. One for cinemas, another for home video and television, each providing a grinning portion of meta pop-culture magic ahead of its time.

A Lasting Legacy

While it was effects expert Rick Baker’s gloriously nasty-looking creatures that captured my attention as a child, this subsurface richness held my interest as an adult. Eventually, I even spoke to Dante about it myself and he had no qualms revealing to me he made the movie with the express purpose of mocking those who loved its silly-yet-sincere predecessor and craved further installments. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he cheerfully disclosed. This anarchic insubordination and resolve to not take his sequel as solemnly as his Warner Bros bosses obviously desired, only made me love it even more.

When I experienced a unexpected loss in the family recently, I was surprised to find that, during my heightest mourning, all I felt compelled to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Odd, no? Perhaps not. The comforting familiarity it offered was needed to thin out my mind’s grief morass – but the insights it had bestowed upon me as an adult were similarly beneficial.

Like Gremlins running amok in a genetics laboratory, there’s certain elements in life you just are powerless over. Dante understands this. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to be like them: welcome the pandemonium, commit your entire being into canned food and shotguns and try not to view the world with undue solemnity.

It’s strong life advice from a most improbable origin – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will forever remain my go-to cinematic solace.